A press release from Fundermental Towers University.
The Latitude Prize 2014
'The Vice Chancellor and Council of Fundermental Towers University are pleased to announce the launch of the Latitude Prize 2014. Whilst the Longitude Prize is seeking to solve one of the greatest issues of our time, the Latitude Prize is seeking to answer one of the most pointless and irrelevant.
Although this may seem like an unnecessary activity, and certainly not something to crow about, we would contest that it is far more important than the self-seeking, publicity tart that is Longitude. Longitude is distracting the attention of some of our greatest minds. We hope instead to distract the attention of time wasters and odd balls, conspiracy theorists and gossipers the world over. By doing so we hope that they'll leave the rest of us alone to get on with things.
We want you to vote for the challenge you think should become the focus of Latitude Prize 2014. The choice of six challenges is:
- Why do people keep posting Buzzfeed personality tests on Facebook?
- If humans have nightmares, what do horses have?
- What did they call orange things before they discovered oranges?
- Why is 'abbreviation' such a long word?
- Did the Americans really land on the moon?
- Why do birds suddenly appear every time that you're near? (will need to be accompanied by a double blind study to ascertain the validity of original assertion)
The winning challenge will be decided by premium rate phone line in June. Hopefully that will ensure that, not only will all the time wasters be occupied by this, but they'll be penniless as well.'
Notes for editors:
- Fundermental Towers University was established on 27 November 2012.
- It is a top 10 university, according to the latest Complete University League Table of all universities in the Greater Rochester area established on or around 27 November 2012. This includes universities established on both 26th and 28th of November.
- It has one of the highest National Student Satisfaction (NSS) survey scores in the crucial 'Access to Daytime TV' category.
- Its state of the art campus includes both back and front gardens.
- Its groundbreaking overseas campus in a tent at the Eurocamp site on the Costa Brava gives students access to world class crazy golf facilities.
- The Latitude Prize is the latest in a range of prestigious initiatives offered by this young and vibrant university. The University is particularly proud of the R2D2 Consortium, a unique collaboration of world beating research and teaching facilities, that is the finest of its type in the Greater Rochester area.