Eaae Ie Oi Aae

Coming up with a good name for a university is a fraught activity. One needs to give the impression of being steeped in tradition whilst being modern, thrusting, and super-innovative.

As you can imagine, it took countless hours in committee to decide on 'Fundermental Towers University'. Members were clearly divided into two camps, those that wanted Fundermental Towers University, and those that wanted to pay homage to the site of our campus, and call ourselves Acacia Avenue University.

Thankfully, a compromise was reached, whereby the formal name of the University is actually 'Fundermental Towers University at Acacia Avenue', although the latter part is dropped during everyday business.

Nevertheless, the high octane world of branding does not stand still for long, and we now need to think about how we can tinker with our name further. Colleagues will be pleased to hear that I am planning to make the case for simplifying our name, and rebrand ourselves 'Fundermentally Rochester'. This is a very modest change similar to how several other large Rochester university institutions are now presenting themselves.

Recently Ebbsfleet White Horse (Unrampant) University dropped the 'unrampant' moniker, although I believe that this has led to some confusion with the 'other' Ebbsfleet White Horse University.

Interestingly, Deangate Ridge Golfing Academy has taken a different tack. It has decided to dispense with all the consonants in its name, seeing them as too 'old fashioned, inflexible and very much pre-92'. It's name will, forthwith, be 'Eaae Ie Oi Aae.' Not only is this a la mode, but it also helps to embed thoughts of tertiary education in young minds when they sing 'Old MacDonald's Farm'.

I'm less certain about the shortening of Snodhurst University. Whilst 'Snod' is undeniably short, I feel it lacks gravitas.

I was please to hear that the senior management  at Kings College London were taking a similar line. They announced earlier this year that they would be dropping 'College' from its name. 'Kings London' has a certain ring, I think, and I reject all the suggestions that it sounds like an aftershave or train station.

If only the KCL senior management had stuck to their guns. Unfortunately they bowed to the power of the petition and are now going to stick with the former name.

Well more fool them. Nothing garners respect like regular rebranding. Just ask Consignia.