The Life of McKinsey, Nurse and Brian

The People's Review of the Research Councils.
Or is it the Popular Research Council Review?

Earlier this month it became clear that the Department of Business, Innovation and Skills had commissioned management consultants McKinsey to review its budget and recommend where cuts could be made. At the same time the Nurse Review is ongoing.

Now read on.

The sewers below Death Star House. A group of revolutionaries, freedom fighters and management consultants are talking in urgent whispers.

McKinsey (for it is he): Once in the building, timing will be of the essence. There's a Research Council feast later in the evening, so we must move fast. And don't wear your best sandals. Turning left here, we enter the Geoffrey Crossick Memorial Sewer, and from there proceed directly to the hypocaust. This has just been retiled, so consultants: careful with those weapons! We will now be directly beneath Rylance's audience chamber itself. This is the moment we strike!